An old journal entry

Just found this and thought I'd share an old journal entry from September 10, 1996; I wrote this at 3:58 in the morning...

"At first, I couldn't sleep.  So, I'm laying there grumbling in my spirit and Tanzania is visioned across my mind, wow!  Okay, I'm next to the most beautiful woman in the world; alright, I can deal with that... I mean, I was away from her for 24 days.  Oh yea, I'm not on a mat in the middle of an African rain storm, getting wet by the second.  I'm not sleeping in the hotel, or guest house, where prostitutes frequent and most likely brought their sin to the very bed I had to rest on.  I'm not sleeping in a mosquito net to protect me from the malaria infested mosquito looming in the room to strike at me.  Or, I'm not outside on rocks in a remote village - hey, I am on a $3,000 bed, a designer style bed that is without a doubt the most comfy bed in the world - a bed that is paid in full, too!  Thanks Lord, I guess I am thankful.  Okay, I will try and sleep.  Nope, can't do it.  So, I go downstairs and open the fridge.  Oh, I forgot, East Africans don't have these cold boxes, thanks Lord.  Out comes 3 sets of juices, 3 bags of chips, 3 peanut butter sandwiches, 3 cookies wrapped in plastic bags to put into 3 brown sacks - you know, food for my three guys for their lunch at school (...can you imagine if my friends in Africa had this luxury?).  Thanks Lord!  I guess I will do start my laundry now; man, do you remember Regina - our African servant, 11,000 miles away?  The one who worked 14 hours a day to feed our team; and, when we retired to rest, she stayed up to cleaned my grimy and smelly clothes for only 200 shillings!  Oh, my washer and dryer... over a $1000, paid for.  Thank you again Lord, how can I be so ungrateful?  Well, I've made it back to my desk, ready to read my Bible - a Bible that costs over 2 months of income for my new friends in Africa; and, not to mention, one of five I own.  Most Tanzanians can't read and most, well, most could never afford God's Word.  My coffee is done now, so I go to the kitchen and put in French vanilla (... do you remember complaining because the chi they gave us had milk in it?) to accompany my addiction.  Back in my home office now, sitting on a designer chair, a desk that is well over $1200; man, what a luxury (do you remember the chair Marty sat in and it broke?  That chair was so old; I would throw it away - the Tanzanians, they immediately began to fix it).  Oh yea, the lights that allow me to read my Bible and write this, they're really bright - nothing like the tin cans that frequent the homes in Tanzania, cans filled with kerosene that emit a black smoke that not only made me cough, the light was so dim I couldn't really see anything.  My eyes are now tearing up; in fact, tears are racing down my cheeks.  I have so much to be thankful for... I am so blessed.  The Psalm that got to me is chapter 50, verse 23, 'He who sacrifices thanks offerings honors me, and he prepares the way so that I may show him the salvation of God!'  Forgive me Lord for neglecting a grateful heart... thanks, thanks and thanks!  You are so good to me my Savior, may Your Name be blessed forever and ever, amen."

Looking back, all these years, I find myself still trapped in a western cultured worldview; I, we have so much in abundance, its simply mindbogglingly.  Today, my heart is inclined to simply look up and say, "Thank You God!"  A gentle reminder to my spirit that every good and perfect gift comes from above (James to the early church).



The Zone

The Zone

The other day I was on a 6 mile run along the bluff just north of Cayucos, totally enjoying the sound of the waves, the mist of the salt water, the birds singing and the absolute beauty of the Central Coast.  As I was increasing my pace, I soon entered The Zone and I was experiencing runners high (If you’ve never experienced an endorphin rush that comes from an elevated heart rate during physical exercise, there’s really nothing like it – it’s simply amazing), a natural high that made all of my issues, my problems seem miniscule.

After my run, as I was driving back to my home in Morro Bay, with sweat rolling down my face, tears welled up in my eyes as I began to reflect on the wonderful life I’ve been blessed with; seriously, a caring & great looking wife, wonderful children, excellent health, a cool job, and a daily relationship with my Creator – so much to be grateful for, the tears just came naturally!

A few hours later, the tyranny of the urgent began to dim The Zone and life had a way of getting back to normal.  Have you ever been there?  When life was working so well only to be blindsided by a disappointment?  Well, of course you have, we all have.  My question, literally then, is how can one maintain that balance of life’s demands and maintain The Zone, as in a runner’s high?  How can I, you, us plod along and not only keep perspective, but also maintain a positive, it will all work out for the good mentality through the good and the bad? 

As a Chaplain and a Pastor, often I deal with some difficult, real life issues; issues like suicide, divorce, drug and alcohol addictions – life issues that if I don’t keep perspective, my mind would short circuit in a matter of seconds.  Here’s a few of the things I do to help keep me, for the most part, stay in The Zone:

• Physical exercise – again, being shape and feeling healthy is paramount for a balanced life
• Alone time – since I’m in the public sector so much, being alone by intention is a great debrief for me
• Daily appointments – I maintain a daily meeting with my Lord to grow spiritually
• Stay positive – I do my best to look at the bright side of things and try to champion the good in others
• Keep perspective – a famous author once wrote, “...all things work together for the good for those who love God...” (Paul to a church in Rome – 1st Century); keeping perspective is key in weathering life

Recently, the MBPD has undergone some radical changes.  From my buddy Richard retiring to Chief Olivas being blessed with a great career move, maintaining a positive outlook and keeping proper perspective is what’s going to get this great department through the impending transitions.  Yes, these announcements and others can move a committed department to anxiety, stress and perhaps even anger or depression; however, by deploying a bit of above, the MBPD will be just fine. 

All to say, if you’re life is chaotic lately, go for a run, get alone, spend some time with your Creator, stay positive and keep perspective – it will all work out!  Thanks for reading, have a great day...

Change

I have learned over the years there is one constant in life and it is constant called change.  Change is defined as to make different, to alter a course or to modify a situation.  Whatever you do, where ever you go, you can be assured of one thing: change will greet you with open arms.   As a pastor, as a chaplain, as a husband, father, friend, coach, I deal with change every day.  When it is good change, oh – it is the best.  When it is bad change, oh – it stinks.  The outcome, though, is always dependent upon how I deal with the inevitable; namely, change will be on the horizon.

Recently, I had a moment, a moment of extreme sadness and melancholy.  It was a Thursday morning and I was in my office working through administrative duties.  I received a phone call the day before informing me that change was knocking on my door.  You see, every Friday, for about six hours, I travel around with the Morro Bay Police Department as a Chaplain.  I have come to totally enjoy my Friday afternoons working with my buddy Richard – watching him perform impeccable police work and being called upon to provide comforting words to the hurting and to bring a hug of encouragement to the distraught.  Well, the phone call informed that Richard was retiring after 35 years of police work.  Initially, I was stoked for my good friend; seriously, a great career executed by an amazing man leaving a memorable legacy is worthy of retirement, right?  Of course!  However, a day later, I was saddened, bummed out and I must confess selfish, “... my Friday’s will never be the same!”  My course of action: I closed my office door, pulled the blinds shut, put on my gym clothes and went over to Fitness Works for a 50 minute cardio workout followed by 200 crunches... I felt better.

When change comes, there are few things I’d encourage you to utilize to navigate your course of action:

1. Embrace it – since change is foreseeable, it makes sense to simply accept it.  There’s an old proverb that says, “The bamboo that bends is stronger that the oak that resists.”  My favorite Pastor puts it this way, “Blessed are the flexible, for they shall not break!”  In the case of Richard’s retirement – it is what it is!  I can’t change it, alter it or manipulate it... I simply have to embrace it.
2. Learn from it – ask yourself what you can learn from the unavoidable; is there something in the change that I can take away to make me a stronger, better person.  Augustine once said when asked about change, “... keep adding, keep walking and keep advancing!”  In other words, how can change grow us in our relationship with our Creator?  I have learned compassion, grace, mercy and love from Richard; not only verbally, but by his example and lifestyle.  My hope is that I can apply what I’ve learned from my pal and incorporate that into my sphere of influence as a pastor and chaplain.
3. Know there’s a future good – when we step out of a situation and view the change with objectivity and pragmatism, the prospect of good coming out of it is clearly visible.  A former Jewish leader named Paul once wrote in a letter to a group of followers in Rome, “... all things work together for the good to those who love God and are called according to His purpose.”  Yes, I will miss hanging out with Richard on Friday afternoons; however, not only will I am able to serve alongside other police officers on Friday’s, I know Richard’s future is bright and full of new opportunities to continue his quest to love on, care for and practically assist the down and out of Morro Bay in totally new ways. 

Well, thanks for hearing my heart.  Richard – we love, honor and respect you.  I will miss our Friday’s, no question.  However, I look forward to future assignments with you as we do our best to serve the citizens of Morro Bay.  To close this brief note, I quote from the lips of Phyllis during yesterday’s house visit, “Richard, you’re retiring?  You are so loved!  You are such a great man!  Thank you!”  Richard’s response: “Thank you!  Just because I’m retired, doesn’t mean I quit caring.  When you see my truck driving up on your property, know I am coming by to check in on you!”  This is the mark of a great man: though retired, he will continue to care, love and serve the object of his heart: people!  Thanks Richard, you’re a keeper!

"Spiritual Antennas"

                  A few years ago, while in Northern Ethiopia, I learned a valuable lesson, a lesson in “Spiritual Antennas!”  You see, I was leading a team of eight missionaries from the West with the goal of starting new churches.  Our target area was in a remote village called Ambo, some three hundred kilometers north of the capital city of Addis Ababa.  It was a Tuesday afternoon when this idea of “Spiritual Antennas” became real for me.  I was with my national translator at a store front on the side of the dirt road; a store made out of mud, cow dung & straw, a store that sold only the necessities of life.  As we began to talk, a group of fifteen men began yelling, screaming and making all kinds of threats - these men were followers of Animism and they felt I, a westerner, was espousing concepts that would bring evil spirits into their village.  Quickly, I informed my translator that we should move on and respect their wishes; he agreed and we walked down the dusty, dirty path toward the countryside.  Within five minutes, the entire village began to scream, yell and cry with utterances that I’ve never heard before.   We were informed that two young boys were feared to have drowned in the river just over the nearby rolling hill.  What I experienced in the next hour was a defining moment in my life: not only did I witness two lifeless boys being pulled out of the raging river, not only I experience deep, deep sadness in the very core of my heart, I was soon to become the blame for this horrific tragedy.                 

                  “Spiritual Antennas” can be defined as an intuition, a sense of something going on around you that is bigger, greater and worthy of attention.  I will never forget that Tuesday for as long as I live.  Yes, the range of emotions I experienced is as real today as it was then, the visual of the men yelling at me, of the two boys, of the mother’s deep pain expressed in wailings no man wants to hear – yes, that day is etched into my memory bank for many years to come.  What I find intriguing though, even now, is the sense I had, the “Spiritual Antennas” my Creator ignited in me, as this entire scene was being played out in front of me like a movie.  You see, because I’m a novice in Amharic, Ethiopia’s native tongue, I had no idea what was going on at the time, no clue my life was in danger.  I did know two things, though.  First, as they carried the limp bodies back to the village, there was this wall between the families and I that was a real as any wall I’ve ever touched!  I greatly desired to carry one of the boys back to the village, to come alongside the family, to cry with them, to hug them, to be with them during this horrific time; however, I simply couldn’t.  Second, as a result of that very real barrier between them and myself, my “Spiritual Antennas” spoke load and clear that I’d better gather my team and leave the area immediately (most of our national friends who came north with us told us not to worry, everything would be fine...boy, were they wrong!).  Accordingly, I sent out word to my team to get back to the hotel, we were leaving.  Within an hour, we were packed and in our rented vehicles heading back to the capital.

                  I’ve learned over the years to live and to trust in “Spiritual Antennas!”  A trusted man in antiquity named Paul once wrote, “...if you are of the Spirit, then be in step with the Spirit.”  In our language, it says, “...if you’re a follower of the Way, then be in touch and in tune with your surroundings – listen closely to what I’m, your Creator, am saying.”  Obviously, I follow my favorite Rabbi whom my buddy Richard calls my ‘2,000 year old buddy.’  Chaplain Jack, Chaplain Jim and I all rely strongly on our spiritual intuition with our favorite Rabbi to function in our respective churches and, within the MBPD as Chaplains.  And we count it an absolute honor to serve, to come alongside and to assist our family at the PD and our Morro Bay residents in spiritual matters.

                  As I reflect back on that Tuesday, even as I pen this article, my heart still moves with compassion for the village of Ambo.  The postscript is thought provoking: about three weeks after I returned to the states, I received an email from my translator.  He informed that the man yelling at me the most, the owner of the store, was the father of both of the boys who drowned: yes, they were brothers.  I was also informed a bomb was immediately built that afternoon intended to be thrown into my hotel room late to kill me.  And, I was told that most of the village was intrigued and moved to ‘follow’ the God of the white man, because the gods of Ambo couldn’t save the boys.  The result: years later, four new churches have started in Ambo.  Crazy days, no question!  I still see the father’s face in my mind; sometimes nightmares visit me about the incident.  And, yes – I still pray for this man and his family, I hope someday I can hug, hold and cry with him; and, who knows, perhaps he and his family attend one of the new churches?  Not sure, one thing I do know though: if it weren’t for “Spiritual Antennas”, I might not be here today...

Thoughts from Genesis 15:1

Genesis 15:1 says, "After these things the Word of the Lord came unto Abram in a vision, saying, '...fear not, Abram: I am thy shield, and thy exceeding great reward.'" This promise to Abram, years ago, is ours for the apprehending - even today! When it all comes down to it, we really have nothing to fear. Abram just defeats four powerful kings and God comes in a vision, calls him by name, and tells him, 'no worries!' Even the greats have fears (Psalm 31:7; 2 Corinthians 7:5), so take heart family - No Worries!  Further, God is our shield; emphatically, the I Am of Exodus 3:14 and John 8:58 is the I Am who is a shield to you – an ever present help in time of need and ever present, every ready to bring comfort!  You see, He's not only the God of Israel, the Almighty Creator God...He is the individual and personal, the intimate God to you, to me, to us!  And, He, God, is not only our reward - He is the reward (1 Corinthians 2:9).  Last, to top it all off: He's our portion, He's our inheritance, and He's our cup that overflows! 

Today, whether your off to work, off to play, off to relax - look up and grab hold of the promise God offers to you; specifically, to eliminate your fears, to be your shield and to be your exceeding great reward!  Blessings...


　
　

Is it really 2012, already?

I cannot believe another year has passed and yet, another year is upon us.  It seems like yesterday that Tami and I made the trek up the coast to begin this new phase of our life, this new chapter of Shepherding and Pastoring a church we knew little about called Rock Harbor Christian Fellowship!  Folks, that was four years ago, wow (I'm sure you've had similar reality checks of life swiftly moving by...)!

As we embark upon the next 365 days, I submit to you a few ideas that if applied, will ensure 2012 to be a year of purpose and meaning.  Check 'em out:

• Spend time alone with your Creator - as a follower of the Way, this is an absolute necessity for my person.  Seriously, if I don't spend time contemplating, meditating, reading and praying, I shrivel up and am totally unproductive.  However, when I do bask in the beauty of my God, life is so much more colorful, so much more alive and so much more joyful.  I encourage you in 2012 to get to know your Maker on a more intimate & personal level - I'm convinced, if you do, your life will never be the same.
• Don't allow the urgent to preempt the important - especially in our western culture, we get so busy we have a tendency to miss those things that really count: our faith, our family, our sanity, our peace.  Be careful NOT to be caught in the tyranny of the urgent and remember to focus on what really matters.  A former tax collector named Matthew once wrote, "Where your treasure is, there will your heart be also!"  I encourage you in 2012 to treasure those things that matter and this simple focus will prevent you from getting lost in the craziness of life's demands.
• Be intentional in your relationships - time is a commodity that once it passes, it can't be recovered.  Hence, set that time aside to be in quality & quantity relationships with your loved ones.  The number two comment of one's passage from this life to eternity is, "I wish I spent more time with my loved ones!"  I encourage you in 2012 to take the advice from the most brilliant Jewish mind of the First Century when he encouraged his readers with, "...redeem the time..." (...the number one comment on one's death bed: I wished I got to know God better...)
• Invest your life into something greater and bigger than you - it is a proven fact, not only in the Bible, but also in secular circles that when humanity invests their life in something bigger than them, fulfillment ensues.  Some 2,000 years ago, a former fisherman wrote that "...he who loses his life will in reality gain it!"  In other words, this paradox of giving your life away for the blessing and betterment of others is truly the key to life.  I encourage you in 2012 to invest your life into something bigger that yourself...
• Step out of your comfort zone - it's been said, "Nothing ever good happens in one's comfort zone!"  It's also been said, "Mediocrity is just the best of the worst..."  Hence, step into what I call faith zone and try something new.  For example, run a marathon?  Go back to school?  Travel to East Africa with me?  Take up surfing?  You know, something that is so out of the ordinary that you must exercise will power to accomplish.  An ancient church in the town of Ephesus was encouraged with the beauty of language in that they were likened unto a master work of art, a work of art that was being painted daily to present the beauty of God's love.  I encourage you in 2012 to step out of your zone and step into faith zone - become what you were destined to be: a beauty work of art that displays God's amazing love.

This coming year, consider these short and brief pointers.  Set some goals within each of them, develop a plan to reach them and then, execute!  My hope and prayer, personally, for 2012 is nothing more than growing daily in my relationship with my God, my family and my friends.  To set up boundaries to protect against getting lost in doing rather than being; and, I'm considering some new ventures that are bigger than me and, as a result, I will have to step out of Randy Zone and step into that faith zone. 

Last, let's commit to make 2012, with God's help, our greatest year yet!  Blessings...

A Day in the Life of a Chaplain

It was last Friday, as my daily routine met me at 4:00am (coffee, meditation coupled with reading & prayer, the financial news on TV, my cat Rafiki jumping on my lap for a morning massage and a cardio workout at Fitness Works...), when I had a hunch, you know an intuition, that this day, Friday the 16th, was going to be a day marked with memories. 

My typical work day on Friday starts with office hours from 8 to 11 where I usually host two or three counseling sessions at Rock Harbor Christian Fellowship.  This office day was routine, encouraging my congregants that with proper Biblical thinking and application, with that 'I can with Him attitude', they would be okay; phone calls, follow up emails and admin type of work marked my morning.  The memories, though, began to pile up around 10:30 when Mary brought over a car full of jackets, scarf's, gloves and sweaters.  You see, the Rotary Club of Morro Bay lives their motto and last Friday they put others above self as they blessed our Citizen's of Morro Bay (our homeless friends) with these timely necessities of life.  Wow - all the goodies from the club literally covered an eight foot table in the lobby at the church.

Well, around 11, I journeyed over to the Morro Bay Police Department, had lunch with my buddy Hannibal and participated in a briefing session with the other officer's.  Before I knew it, Richard & I were in his squad car cruising the streets of Morro Bay - looking for the bad guys and offering a helping hand to those in need.  The afternoon brought a few police calls, some report writing for Richard and a citizen follow up to provide police information.  We drove back to the church and gathered all the tokens of love Mary brought from Rotary.

Amanda and me

At 4:00 in the afternoon, Hannibal and I drove over to Morro Bay's Domino's to buy pizza for our friends at the park, you know the Citizen's!  As we walked into the shop, Oliver, the store manager, met us and provided free soda & free deserts.  We were ecstatic, knowing the pizza was going to be a great treat for the gang.  We arrived about 5 and we welcomed like we were heroes; seriously, any preconceived ideas you may have about homeless folks, if you were with us, they would be eliminated.  These friends are so nice, so thankful and simply, so gracious - you'd be amazed!  As we prayed and they began to eat, another memory showed up: Amanda and her two children.  Amanda is a fine member from the Rotary Club and she came with more goodies to pass out: bags of toiletries, toothpaste, toothbrushes, deodorant, hand wipes, etc.  Oh, the gang was so happy.  And then, another blessing came, another memory in the person of Elaine.  She, with her husband and two other angels brought Christmas presents for our homeless family; presents that brought not only tears to my eyes, but tears to the eyes of many our of homeless folk.

Jamie, Jacob and Elaine

Needless to say, Richard and I drove away from Lila Kaiser Park in Morro Bay on Cloud Nine; we were literally blown away with the magnanimous hearts of so many who stepped out of themselves to simply say, in a tangible way, that these homeless friends really matter!  Thank You to Rock Harbor for blessing the family with Pizza; Thank You to Domino's for the soda and desert; Thank You to the Morro Bay Rotary Club for the wonderful clothing and necessities to make it through the cold winter; and, Thank You to Elaine and her family for bringing the joy of Christmas to a group of people that so many in society treat as outcasts - for at least one night, the Citizen's of Morro Bay were treated with decency, respect and love...treated in a way that was simply what my favorite Rabbi said, "Do unto others as you would have done unto you!"

Well, my day was about over when I arrived home, prepared a salad and began to enjoy dinner with my gal.  We prayed, began to eat and share how our respective day went.  Oh about half way through our meal, I received a call from dispatch that there was an 1144 (police language for a death) and if possible, could I go over to the house and provide comfort.  I immediately told Pat yes and drove over to the home.  I arrived at the home, walked in and introduced myself.  After long hugs with the widow and the son, we held hands and asked God to bring peace & comfort to this very sad family.  We hugged again, I promised to follow up with a phone call the next day and committed to be available for further care & counseling if needed. 

As I retired for the evening, being thoroughly exhausted, I had to thank my Creator for an amazing day that in my opinion, I was able to taste a bit of what heaven must be like: caring, giving, benevolence and of course, unconditional love.  In fact, I felt that I was doing exactly what I was created to do; namely, invest my life into others!  And, this was all A Day in the Life of a Chaplain!

Have a great day and thanks for reading...