The other

Some times I wonder if the world would be a better place if we simply looked to serve our fellow human beings instead of serving ourselves.  I'm fairly confident that we would have a more peaceful, harmonious existence if we took the advice of an ancient Rabbi named Jesus when he said, "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you!"  I'm positive life would be amazingly great if we as people made ourselves available to be available, even when it's inconvenient.  

I'm currently at Hickam Air Force Base in Hawaii visiting my son and daughter-in-law.  As I've had some time to chill, I've been working through some thoughts that I haven't been able to reconcile.  Namely, thoughts of why our society is seemingly spiraling out of control with terrible acts of violence.  For instance, we had the theatre tragedy in Colorado a number of months ago, we witnessed the Oregon mall shooting on CNN, most of us shed plenty of tears when we were informed of the Connecticut Elementary School shootings, and most recent, the terrible act of horror at the Boston Marathon.  

I just have to wonder what would this place we call earth be like if we all took on the form of serving 'the other' first, considering the needs of others more important than our own and, being proactive to simple be there and be ready.  John Wesley, the founder of the Methodist movement once wrote, "Do all the good you can, by all the means you can, in all the ways you can, in all the places you can, at all the time you can, to all the people you can, as long as you even can."  

I know full well that all we can do is what we do when we do by how we do; in other words, we can only impact our very own sphere of influence.  My good friend, retired cop Richard, always reminds me that we have a fifty foot radius around us.  He adamantly encourages me to impact that fifty feet with passion, rigor and impact.  There's a Greek word for this and it's called Oikos.  This ancient word means that each of us have 8 to 12 people we live life with.  The question, then, is what will we do with that 8 to 12 people we live life with? Will we serve, encourage and help them?  Or, will we wait for them to serve us?  That same Rabbi Jesus articulated 2,000 years ago that he came not to be served but to serve and to give his life as a ransom for many. At our church in Morro Bay, we have a saying that does like this, "Don't come to church to be blessed - you come to be a blessing!"

I recently read a book by Rick Warren on serving others.  He states that servants are those who:

* make themselves available

* pay attention to the needs of others

* do every service with equal dedication

* are faithful, humble and reliable

* think more about others than themselves 

The list goes on, but I think you get the point.

As 2013 is almost half over, I propose that we commit to the next 7 months to serving 'the other'.  I'm not sure what that looks like for you, but I think if we take the simple advice of the aforementioned, perhaps our world will be a better place (at least it will in our neck of the woods).

I close this note with a story of a young nun, who in 1950, received a call within a call.  Mother Teresa wrote in her memoirs that she felt God telling her to go to the poorest place on the earth and give her life away to the poor.  Well, she went to Calcutta and as the saying goes, the rest is history. When we hear of Mother Teresa, we immediately hear servant, we remember a woman who made herself available, paid great attention to the needs of others, was totally dedicated, faithful, humble and reliable; was one who is defined as thinking more about 'the other' than herself.  

Who knows, if we simply infuse into our life these principles just maybe, maybe life would be that much more meaningful and purposeful.  

Thanks for listening - now go find some one to serve, help, come alongside and be available ...

Randy

Enable or Empower

Last month, the Estero Bay Alliance for Care (EBAC) and the City of Morro Bay hosted a seminar that highlighted the needs within our community; namely, needs ranging from those who are struggling to make ends meet to the needs of our homeless population.  The turnout was spectacular and you could almost feel a vibe of altruism in the air as many encouraged attendees signed up to help.  We discovered that the citizens of Morro Bay have all one thing in common, a heart to help.  It's a heart characterized by a spirit of giving, a magnanimous way about them that drives them to serve, to help, to assist and to come through for the needy, the less fortunate, the homeless, those who simply need a helping hand.  It's this selfless part of our community that makes living on the Central Coast truly a blessing. The volunteers from EBAC are so encouraged and we are confident that the future is bright. 

As we've had time to soak-in that great day last month, one persistent question continues to come to mind.  Specifically, how can and how do we provide tools and resources to help those in need?  When are we suspect of enabling and when are we responsible for empowering?  Our heart as a volunteer group is to empower one to a lifestyle of productivity and to never enable one in their cycle of brokenness.  And you know, there's a fine line between enabling someone and empowering someone.  When do we help one in need?  How often?  How much do we give?  When do we say no when helping might be wrong?  Is it wrong?  What is tough love?  What is genuine, authentic love?  These questions have been in our thoughts for some time now and to be honest, I'm not sure I have the answer.  This is really a tough road to walk and one that requires extreme wisdom and discernment.

                 This morning in my staff meeting at my church, I asked my team to define both of these words in context of helping those in need.  Here's what they came up with:

• Enable: giving someone permission to continue in negative behavior; giving the means and encouragement to do those things that destroy them.
• Empower: to give someone what they need to succeed; to provide the necessary tools to help someone win. 

We have a saying at the fellowship that goes like this, "Never enable someone that God is disabling."  In other words, the very kind heart so many of us have might be the exact opposite gesture the one who is struggling needs.  Now, I need to throw out a disclaimer: I have no question or doubt that the 40,000 residents of San Luis Obispo County who received 5.4 million pounds of food in 2012 are hard working, productive citizens.  This is in no way is a slur or a negative on their situation - as the saying goes, many are one pay check away from great challenge.  This is truly the majority of those we help - great people who have come into hard times.  The issue arises with a small segment of our society that this differentiating between enabling and empowering must be addressed. 

                A number of years ago, back in my corporate days, I had a premonition that I needed to help a homeless man.  He was sitting in front of a Mobil gas station in La Jolla, Ca.  I was having lunch at an exclusive restaurant across the street with a buddy.  Well, my heart was to help, but my head said no.  I told myself, "If he is still there after my meal, I will help him!"  Well, my $30 meal was terrible, not because the Elephant Bar had a bad chef, but because I was denying what I had to do, namely, help the guy.  After an hour and a half, I walked out of my lunch date and guess what?  You're right: he was still there.  I drove over and grabbed a new Bible I had in my car and put $5.00 in it (what a generous guy, right...five bucks?).  I walked up to him and said, "Sir, I have something for you."  I handed him the Bible and proceeded to tell him there was a whopping Lincoln enclosed.  He looked at me, stood up and with tears in his eyes, he said, "Dude, thank you so much.  I was robbed the other day.  They took my backpack and my Bible.  Oh, this is the greatest gift I could ever have.  Thank you!"  I replied, "Your welcome.  Hey, there's $5.00 in there too."  He answered, "I don't want your money, this Bible is all I need!"  Well, needless to say, I was humbled and blessed.

                Back to our question, or dilemma, if you will - where's the fine line?  I'm not sure; however, I do know this: we as people are called to help 'the other'.  Regardless of the situation, regardless of the person, I feel that we're compelled to give out of our self to help, to assist and to bless.  My favorite Rabbi (as my buddy and former cop Richard calls Jesus) said one day, "... to the least of these, you've done it unto Me!"  I love this thought: when I help someone in need, it is as if I am doing it for my Creator.  That helps me in the whole enabling and empowering discussion; if I see a need, I am called to fill it, to fill it with wisdom and discernment, to have grace for the recipient; and, to remove self out of the equation. 

Maybe that's the answer: to help, to pray and to serve those in need and leave the results to them and their Maker?  Well, these are some of my thoughts - I'm not convinced I've figured it out though.  Hey, if you have any insight, please feel free to share them, we would love and appreciate your input.  Thanks for reading, have a great day!

'Going Camping'

I started something new this year called 'Going Camping.'  I love backpacking, hiking and campfires; I thoroughly enjoy fresh fish tacos and blue lakes in the mountains.  I even enjoy a 50 pound pack strapped to my back and the work that comes with it.  The cool breeze, sleeping under the stars, life can't be much better.  This summer I hope to tackle the Eastern Sierras and venture high elevations on long, arduous walks to simply bask in the freedom of the outdoors.  

As a Christ follower, I too love to spend time daily with my Master, hanging out, meditating, talking and listening to His tender quiet voice.  The Word instructs us to not allow His Word to depart from us and that we should meditate on it day and night so we may have a fruitful life (Joshua 1:8).  Well, in light of this, I'm trying something a bit different this year for what I call 'alone time.'  Namely, I've been 'Going Camping.'  Well, not in the conventional way; rather, I've been 'Going Camping... Spiritually.'  In other words, I've been picking one section of scripture a week to camp out with.  My thought: there are 52 weeks a year and if I can pick one camp site a week, I will have hidden 52 nuggets of truth in my heart for 2013.  

Thus far, I've camped at and learned:

Week one: Philippians 1:9-11 – I'm to abound more in love 

Week two: Romans 11:36 – life is about, for and because of Him

Week three: Colossians 1:28 – Randy, point people to Jesus

This week, my destination is 1 Peter 4:11.  This is a great passage to walk with, a great verse to sit with, reflect upon and apply.  You see, Peter is instructing believer’s who have been forced out of Jerusalem due to persecution to speak as if they are speaking on behalf of God.  And, when they serve, they are to serve only with the power that He provides.  Talk about a trail that is a challenge; talk about a route that is convicting.  Further, Peter sums up his heart when he writes, “… that in everything God may be glorified through Jesus Christ…”  

To be honest with you, this is a tough road to walk for me.  I many a time forget to listen before I speak; I all too often do before I think about a consequence.  And, I truly have a narcissistic way about me – many a day is about Randy and not about my Lord.  Ok, enough self deprecating, that’s not productive.  Rather, the encampment called 1 Peter 4:11 invites me, with His strength, to be His spokesman and His servant to a world that desperately needs His love.  In so speaking and doing, the end result is that my journey brings Him glory and honor.  And further, my satisfaction and purpose in life is totally linked and dependent upon bringing Him praise. 

Well, my encouragement - go camping and sit with God.  Psalm 46:10 says, "Be still and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth!"  Seriously, there isn't a greater privilege in life than to be in relationship with our Creator.  Blessings to you and as the new phrase goes, 'Peace Out!' 

Life Lessons

I just returned from a village called Barangay Handumanan.  My dear friends, Joe and Billy, have been loving and serving 'at risk' children for over twenty five years in this district of Negros Occidental, Philippines.  Their family is over 180 children; and yes, I use the word family with intention.  You see, every child, every teenager is treated, considered and cared for as blood; in fact, the warm welcome our team received was one of the most tender moments I've experienced in my 52 years of existence.  Seriously, words are insufficient to articulate the love my heart feels for my family in the Philippines.

This trip was yet another amazing time, full of lessons and convictions.   As a missionary, my intent is to travel to the 'ends of the earth' to share my love for God, a calling I take with great sincerity and passion.  I always intend to be a blessing, however, I must confess, in my over 25 trips overseas, from East Africa to the South Pacific, from the Middle East to Southeast Asia, I always come home the one blessed, the one changed and the one challenged.  This trip was no different; actually, if I'm brave enough to be vulnerable, I must admit this experience has shaken my spirit in crazy good, life changing ways.  For example, here's a few highlights that exposed my some of my foibles:

·         Pure joy - my family at the Rosmarino home work, serve and play with a joy that only comes from within.  It's a joy that truly puts the other first, it's a joy that says you're more important and it's a joy that humbles my heart.  From the 5am grass cutting outings that feed the cows, to the saw dust afternoon excursions that help eliminate the stench that comes with farming.  From the 1 hour manual dish washing team that works feverishly three times a day in the kitchen to the manual laundry room team that cleans soiled clothing daily, not once did I hear a complaint, a sarcastic comment or a negative remark.  All I heard were smiles (yes, smiles speak load and clear), words of encouragement and even touches of love.  These precious brothers and sisters of mine struck a chord in my humanity that truly confronts the motives and the attitudes of my heart when it comes to my daily journey...

·         Compassionate lifestyle - Aida is my friend.  We're pretty close in age, though I'm sure I have a few years on her.  Aida's main role in life: to love and care for a young man with Cerebral Palsy named Moses.  Whether it is 2am or 2pm, she is available to serve this precious young teenager whenever he needs assistance.  Oh, Aida does so much more: she cooks, she cleans, she teaches; she loves, she worships and she embodies what Christianity is intended to be.  After 15 hour days, Aida's 'I love Jesus' smile is the most precious attribute anyone could ever possess.  Aida, once again, taught me that life isn't about her - life is about the investment of one's resources to make the other comfortable, welcomed and loved.  Thanks Aida for the reminder...

·         Abundant life - this young girl touched my heart deeply, so deep that tears come easily when I think of her.  Eloisa is 15 or so, and she too has a debilitating condition.  Her speech, her motor skills and her communication is hindered by her disease.  However - are you ready?  Every time she strolls by you, she belts out a worship song.  And, she sings with diction, perfect pronunciation and a beauty that is truly music to one's ears.  Last week, I was eating my dinner and she walked by me with her caregiver.  She looked me and she began to sing, "You have given life me!"  Tears ran down my face as she sang of her gratitude and thankfulness to God; when she finished, she could not contain herself.  She jumped up and down repeatedly, clapped her hands and yelled out, "YEA! YEA! YEA!"  Oh, I wish I could play the video I took of her - it was one of those moments that I will take into eternity with me.  Eloisa, I love you sister - you are a such a blessing to me...

·         Genuine faith - our excellent team leader, Brandie Bledsaw, had a vision last year of starting an outreach called 'Love In Action.'  This practical means of spreading God's love came to fruition at the public hospital where we passed out love bags full of goodies on two different occasions.  Last Saturday, after we gave out over 250 love bags to hurting patients, we were positioned to head back to our home when we discovered a hurting young boy laying on his mother's lap outside of the ER.  Billy, known as Nanay, immediately walked over to provide help.  She directed the team to buy medical supplies, began to assist the mother, deployed Khenna Marie (a former child and student at the home & now the head nurse) to provide her medical expertise.  What impressed me so much was their willingness to drop everything to help.  This boy, Ropurt, had an explosive go off and glass particles pelted his body and he suffered multiple burns.  Billy and Joe (Tatay) volunteered to bring this lady, her sister and the hurting boy to their home, at NO charge, to provide the medical help that would save his life.  Can you imagine? Burn victims take weeks, if not months, to heal and yet, the Rosmarino's were more than willing to offer their home as a place of refuge to display what I call authentic Christianity.  Thanks guys for displaying "... as you do for the least of these, you've done it unto Me!"

I could go on and on with story after story, lesson after lesson of my two weeks in Barangay Handumanan; an experience that overwhelms my thoughts and life.  I guess the transformational principle, if you will, is joy, compassion, abundance, and realness come from within.  One simply can't conjure up joy or compassion; one surely can't manufacture abundance or genuine faith.  Truly, these characteristics of the Rosmarino home come from above; and, I submit, these traits aren't something they do, rather, it is who they are.  And, I'm convinced, it's because of Whose they are!  Thanks for reading, I pray my experience was a blessing for you!

Family at it's best - we love you!

New Beginnings

Some thoughts of mine from a recent article I wrote published in a police newsletter:

                It's that time again, a time for reflection, a moment of self-evaluation and yes, a concerted effort at New Year's Resolutions.  We've just celebrated Christmas, Hanukkah and the Holiday Season.  For most, we gorged ourselves with turkey, ham and mash potatoes, we ate way to many holiday brownies and we drank far too much cider.  The Christmas lights are back up in the rafters, the Menorah is put away and all the December traditions are packed and readied for next year.  And now, it's time for change; it's time to do something about this thing we call life.  After all, we aren't getting any younger, right?

A New Year's resolution is simply a commitment one makes to a personal goal; it is made in anticipation of the New Year, a new start.  It isn't a surprise that the top three resolutions for 2013 are weight loss, a goal to quit smoking and a zeal to begin exercising; it's also not a surprise that over 75% of those that do make resolutions fail within the first week, another 70% within two weeks and almost 50% quit within the first six months (actually, less that 10% ever achieve their goal...).

I have an idea for this coming year.  Yes, do lose weight if you need to - your health depends on it.  Oh, if you do smoke, it would be a great idea to stop as well.  And of course, as an old athlete, I can't emphasize the importance of being in shape.  My thought for 2013: let's invest our time into 'the other'.  Namely, for 2013, how about seeking people that you can give yourself to.  At our church, for this past Christmas season, I challenged our family to invest their time and life into 'the other'; the feedback I have received from countless individuals has been overwhelmingly positive.  You see, there is no greater joy, no greater meaning, no greater fulfillment than to give your time, attention and love to 'the other'.  We have a rule at Rock Harbor, a rule we live by.  Specifically, everyone who walks through the doors of our church is considered a special guest invited by God and worthy of our love, attention and affirmation.  Likewise, I've challenged our church to extend this mindset outside the walls of our church.  How about joining us? Why not considering those you meet, those you frequent, as special guests invited by God into your life that are longing for time, attention and love? 

And, instead of a New Year's Resolution, how about a New Beginning?  A paradigm shift, if you will, a new focus on 'the other'.  Modern psychology teaches that giving one's life to the other is the most healthy thing anyone can do.  The Torah instructs over and over that 'the other' is the key to fulfillment in life.  My favorite Rabbi Jesus is famous for saying, "It is more blessed to give than to receive!"  How about it?  You have twelve months in front of you to love, care for and invest your life into 'the other'. 

You know, with all the tragedies our world has, with all the brokenness we experience, I'm convinced it's time for all of us to get outside of ourselves and get into the business of loving, caring and blessing 'the other'.  Who knows - perhaps our Creator has a divine appointment in store for you that will radically alter one's future because of your New Beginning - a beginning to treat 'the other' as you would like to be treated. 

Happy journey, thanks for hearing me out, and best to you as you think about and perhaps embrace my idea of 'the other'. 

It’s Christmas Time!

I remember growing up as a young guy in Huntington Beach and celebrating Christmas with my wonderful family.  My parents literally spent weeks preparing for the morning solely to watch their kids explode with joy, experience belly laughter and display excessive happiness.  You see, the three of us would sleep side by side every Christmas Eve, wake up before the sun and wait expectantly for the celebration.  My folks wouldn't allow us to enter the living room until they had their morning coffee and prayer time – we were stuck in the back of the house wondering what was under the tree, guessing what was in our stockings... the anticipation was simply overwhelming.  Well, when the time came, usually around 7:30, we would witness the most colorful, decorative room on the planet. There was the tree packed with presents, the lights were glowing, the fire blazing, and the scent of the tree at an all time high (and yes, Santa even left cookie crumbs on the plate next to the fire place).  My dad would try to calm us down as he read the Christmas story from the Gospel of Luke and proceeded to share with us the meaning of this great historical event. 

When Tami and I began our family, we not only carried on this tradition, we added a new custom to our celebration.  Namely, before our boys could open their stockings and gifts, they would give a present to Jesus.  Our rationale: it’s His birthday, why are we getting all the presents?  So, our guys would spend the month of December thinking about what they would give Him, how they might make Him happy and appreciative.  Once they settled on a gift, they would wrap their gifts and bring them out on Christmas morning and share with our family their heart behind their gift.  The gifts ranged over the years from our five year old Zachary giving Jesus three $1.00 bills, to our middle son Sean giving Jesus his cherished Jerry Rice football card to our oldest Matthew giving Jesus more of his time.  Ah, the memories of those days still bring tears to my eyes.

I must admit, as an old guy now, I still really love Christmas and the traditions my little family has created!  The memories are etched into my thoughts as if they were yesterday… great, great times!  And, as I’ve matured over the years,  I have grown to understand in greater depth the true meaning of Christmas; namely, it’s about giving – the giving of oneself to bless, to encourage and to love.  My favorite Rabbi once said, “… it is better to give than to receive!”  And, when we think about, isn't this what Christmas is all about?  God giving that we might have fulfillment, purpose and a future good? 

This Christmas season, no matter your tradition, how about giving something a little different this year – something of yourself?  The East Coast is hurting terribly from Hurricane Sandy – Samaritan’s Purse is a non-profit organization that is actively serving those in need in New Jersey and New York.  The country of Nigeria is greatly in need – for only $25, The Voice of the Martyr’s provides a gift to children at Christmas time – children that have NEVER had a gift at Christmas.  We have needs right here in our community.  The MBPD can provide you with information on families in need – my buddy Richard and I would be happy to connect you with folks who could use a gift of love. 

Bottom line – let’s agree to celebrate Christmas together this year and give… give with a heart of love, give of yourself, give to someone in need.  And, I submit to you that if this is the motive of our heart this Christmas, the true meaning of this season will be realized.  Namely: the gift of love!  Merry Christmas.

The ultimate love

I’m hanging out in San Luis Obispo at my favorite coffee shop, second only to the Java House in Nairobi, Kenya.  I’m here sipping on a dark roast blend, people watching and working on my message for this Sunday.  My topic for this weekend is from an old document written by a guy named John.  Some 2,000 years ago, he recorded an incident that is dear to my heart; namely, the non-judgmental, I love you for who you are type of life that characterized my favorite Rabbi.

You see, in this story Jesus is asked what He would do with a woman caught in the very act of adultery.  The religious leaders, you know – the one’s that walked around acting like they were better than everyone, felt that she should be punished to the full extent of the Mosaic Law (a potential death sentence).  Jesus looked at them, stooped down to the ground and began to write something in the dirt.  They continued to banter Him with the question and He finally responded, “He who is without sin, cast the first stone.”  In other words, “...you rock throwers, you judgmental hypocrites – if you’re perfect, stone her...”

Well, the story goes that the oldest to the youngest left the temple due to their guilty conscious and Jesus was left alone with the gal.  What intrigues me is how He responds to this seemingly guilty sinner.  First, He shows compassion.  Can you imagine how embarrassed this lady was?  He poses a question to her and asks where her condemners were.  Further, to solidify His compassion, He addresses her with the word woman.  In the Greek language, this word is the very same word He used when He addressed his mother.  He shows compassion to this lady when He could have placated to a mean, critical worldly spirit.  Second, He loves her right where she was when He said, “... neither do I condemn you!”  I love this about Him – He didn’t tell her to clean up her act, He didn’t highlight all her failures and, He didn’t attack verbally... He simply loved her!  And third, Jesus told her to “...go and sin no more.”  In other words, in the Greek phraseology: there’s a far greater life for you to live than the one you’re currently living – go and live a life of purpose, a life of meaning and life in relationship with your Creator.

As I reflect on this wonderful display of the ultimate love, I’m convicted on a couple of fronts.  One area is that of judgment.  How many times do I carry a rock of condemnation around to hurl at one who isn’t living up to where I feel they should live?  Just this morning on my way into SLO, I ran into a few of Morro Bay’s homeless guys near my house.  I pulled up next them in my truck and asked how they were doing.  Their response, “... you know Pastor, we’re doing...”  Five years ago, I probably wouldn’t have given them the time of day.  However, as I’ve become close friends with my cop-friend Richard, and have witnessed his I care about you for who you are lifestyle, I’ve learned to love these guys right where they are (I was impressed that they were going around looking for recyclables to earn money for their breakfast...).  Another area that convicted me about this 2,000 year old story was my dismissal of the needs of others because of my busy schedule.  Here’s the most famous Rabbi of his day taking time out of his day to love an outcast, a broken and a hurting woman; a lady that potentially could be put to death.  How many times do I get so caught up in the moment that I miss an opportunity to care, to love and to invest my life into the life of others?  In all seriousness, when I arrived at the Starbucks on Marsh in SLO, on the bench outside of California’s Pizza Kitchen was a man named Frank.  He too is homeless and he frequents Morro Bay, San Luis Obispo and Grover Beach.  This wasn’t the first time I’ve ran into him outside of our city.  Well, sad to say, in my humanity and crazy busy day, I simply said, ‘Hello Frank, how are you – I have to write a sermon for Sunday, have a nice day!”  Hum... I must say not a great example for a man of the alleged cloth.  I probably should have spent $3.00 and bought him a sandwich, talked with him and hung out for ten minutes (I’m sure my sermon would be better if I did...); however, I missed an opportunity. 

Thanks for hearing me out.  I guess the lesson for me, for us to consider is to a live a life of no judgment, to live a life of investing into others and to pursue a life of the ultimate love my Rabbi showed that lady in Jerusalem two millennia ago.  Have a great day...