In Celebration of Sea Glass

A few weeks ago, I teased my wife from the stage at our church about her fetish to collect Sea Glass.  I went on and on about how boring it is, that someone else's trash is her treasure - you know, the fun digging that only a loving, considerate and sensitive husband can get away with.  Well, unbeknownst to me, the Director of the Cayucos Sea Glass Festival (the largest festival in the country, I'm told) was in the audience, as was her administrator and our amazing bass player Jeff - the epitome of a sea glass enthusiast.  When I was informed of my blunder(s), I walked over to  them and bowed, apologized and felt like a complete dunce as the congregation enjoyed a serious belly laugh at this dope they call their Pastor - seriously, I'm still trying to get out of the dog house with my Tami over this idiotic display of stupidity called an attempt at humor.

Well, Tuesday's are a date night for Tami and I, so, I did the husband thing and went sea glassing (don't tell my buddies - please, the last time I attempted this hobby I was razzed for weeks on end...) two days ago... guess what?  It wasn't too bad, I had a great time with my gal and, I actually had a spiritual epiphany regarding collecting brown, white, clear, red, blue, and yellow sea glass.  As I attempted to act like I was enjoying the moment, each piece of glass that I picked up began speaking to me.  NO - not verbally, but my mind began to consider the plight of each piece and all of a sudden I realized that each and every piece of sea glass, regardless of color, size, shape or ethnicity (... come on, give me a little artist liberty, will ya?), had the same characteristics.  Check it out, they all were:

·       broken

·       isolated

·       lonely

·       and, worthless

As I thought about it, metaphorically, we as people can be likened unto to sea glass.  We've all broken at one time or another and forced into isolation because of the pain, hurt and wounds of life.  This further exasperates us into an existence of loneliness because we're considered worthless, from an internal perspective and even external, from people, at times.  However, when Christ, The Great Sea Glass Collector, comes to the sands of our life - He searches and with intention and resolve looks to collect us, desires to mend our brokenness, without question He embraces our isolation, wholeheartedly welcomes our lonely state and, are you ready: He takes the worthlessness of us and not only makes us something beautiful, He shows off His find, called you and I, for all of creation to see!  Wow, pretty amazing - can I have an amen? 

When I take the time to consider how privileged I am and how totally blessed I am to be considered His child, my mind spins iout of control with appreciative gratitude.  The following verse is my new sea glass verse:

"Again, the kingdom of heaven is like treasure hidden in a field, which a man found and hid; and for joy over it he goes and sells all that he has and buys that field." Matthew 13:44

This evening, before you retire, look up and thank God He considered you worthy to find you on that beach of brokenness, isolation, loneliness and worthlessness in order to give you life, give you purpose, give you forgiveness, give you love - and on and on and on!  Never forget, you're His treasure, His very own, if you will, beautiful find!  Blessings...

Do unto others

I was in the badger state again, being trained, equipped to become a more effective leader, a more relevant communicator and a more passionate Pastor.  You see, I'm completing a two year journey called Christian Excellence in Congregational Leadership at Green Lake Conference Center in Green Lake, Wisconsin.  And, to be candid, I've come to love this place: from the cheese curds, to the Packer fans; from the really cool accents these folks have to the genuine kindness these mid-westerners possess; and from the beauty of the land to the world famous custard from Leon's - it's truly an awesome state. Just outside my room, less than a football field in length, was this view:

Not to shabby, hah?  Well, when we showed up last week, we were really late and ran into the dining hall to see if we could grab a bite to eat before our first session - we missed it and all agreed spending the day in Chicago three hours south was worth the risk of not eating dinner.  As we proceeded to check into our rooms, this dear lady ran up and said, "Gentlemen, come back and sit down; dinner is being prepared!"  From the looks of the 500 seat room, they had already cleaned, vacuumed, mopped and began preparing for the next days business.  We told her that it wasn't necessary to feed a bunch of overweight 50 year olds and that we'd be fine; she insisted and with that look of I'm here to serve you, ushered us back into the dining hall and sat us down like we were royalty.  Now, you might think she acted this way because that's what she gets paid for, she was just doing her job, etc.  Not so, this gal was genuine and authentic in her desire to make us feel like we were really important.

The next day, as I was running along the lake shore the during a lunch break, I reflected on this servants example and I identified at least five really cool characteristics that she exemplified that really spoke to my heart:

• Kindness second to none - her eyes and smile spoke tenderness
• Service above self - it was clear that life wasn't about her
• Compassionate courtesy - yes, more than mid-westerner charm
• Totally cool - she even told us she was a Milwaukee Brewer fan
• Excessive Happiness - her belly laugh proved her inward joy

Seriously, this was all the training, lectures and workshops I needed; this lady not only lived the Golden Rule, she was the Golden Rule!  Well, later in the week, during another run along the shore at Green Lake, as I was listening to my I-Pod, I began to evaluate my life, my treatment of others, etc., in light of this gal's example.  Sad to say with all candor, I fall so short and have so much to learn in comparison to this saint (I'm sure I would have told the late comers they missed dinner and it might be a good idea next time to wear a watch).  As I was getting into my run, I asked myself how did she do it?  Why did she do it?  After a few miles, I came to the conclusion that she simply treats each person as a valuable guest, a creation of God that is worthy of her respect.  When I think of this incident, and I do often, I'm reminded of some lyrics from one of my favorite Christian bands; they goes like this:

Let the songs I sing bring joy to You

Let the words I say ‘fess my love

Let the notes I choose be your favorite tune

Father let my heart be after You

Father let my heart be after You

You know, this lady at Green Lake Conference Center personifies these lyrics and she lives with intention to please her Father (Heavenly...).  As I close, my hope and prayer is that I can glean from this lady's life and incorporate her way into how I treat others.  For you, my hope and prayer is the same - consider the lyrics, consider the gal from Wisconsin and, consider your treatment of others.  Remember what my favorite Rabbi said some 2,000 years ago, "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you!"

I'm not okay with that

I need of a week off once a quarter to maintain my sanity and effectiveness as a person, else I become the proverbial jerk!  Seriously, as a Pastor and as a Chaplain, I daily encounter some of the most difficult challenges life can offer & a debrief brings the much needed break... well, this is one of those weeks and yes, I'm hanging out vacationing.  Originally, I was heading south with a 15' Force 5 sailboat with a destination of San Diego.  My thought was I would coach my pole vaulters at the prestigious Russell Cup track and field meet in Santa Barbara on Saturday, then head south to hang with two of my sons and come home the following Thursday.  When I shared my intentions with my gal, well... you know how that went: I was quickly reminded I committed to build that fence at our home, finish that project I started a year ago and, detail her car... so, I'm here on the coast, feverishly working through my honey do list.

It was two days ago, Monday, the second day of my debrief, that I chose to run 6 or so miles along the bluff between Cayucos and Cambria (no question: one of the most picturesque spots on the planet).  As I began my run, with my I-Pod and ear phones in place, a song from Need to Breathe figuratively grabbed my heart.  The song is called "Stones Under Rushing Waters" and the lyrics go like this:

Why don't we dance anymore

I'm not okay with that

Why don't we laugh anymore

I'm not okay with that

The years go by like stones under rushing waters

We only know, we only know when its gone

Yeah, the years go by like stones under rushing waters

We only know, we only know when its gone

Why don't we smile anymore

I'm not okay with that

Why don't we dance anymore

I'm not okay with that

As I was running, not paying attention, I tripped in a hole and pulled my left gastrocnemius (that's a calf muscle) and initially displayed signs of frustration (I'm thinking about competing in a 5K run in Wisconsin next month - a pulled gastrocnemius will eliminate my dreams of gold...).  However, as this song's message rang in my ears, I quickly reassessed and began to take inventory.  Seriously, I wasn't dancing emotionally, I wasn't laughing literally, and I definitely wasn't smiling overtly - not because of the pain in my leg, but honestly, from simply existing in my busy world.  As I reflect on the lyrics of this song, I'm realizing that we're all caught up in life such that we don't take the time to dance, laugh or smile.  Further, we're plagued by a cultural expectation that you, I, we must get this done, we must get that done, and that a busy life is a successful life (yes, even the honey do list can be viewed as an assignment verses a tangible way to express my love and appreciation for my dream named Tami!).

Also, the metaphor in the song aptly communicates the Central Coast's salty water rushing over the stones day in and day out; and, yes, they will continue to do so for who knows how long.  The issue isn't that the water will do its thing, the issue is life can be so demanding that the beauty she offers will be missed and we will only know that truth when its all too late.  At the church I serve at, we encourage our family to be and not do.  In other words, don't do Christianity, be Christianity; don't do Church, be Church.  We often remind ourselves that our doing solely flows from our being.  And, in our perspective, that being comes from a personal relationship with our Creator.

Hence, today I'm going to choose to dance (Tami and I are actually learning Salsa Dancing at Cal Poly on Friday nights...), I'm going to choose to laugh and yes, I'm going to choose to smile - often.  My encouragement to you is the same: find a place to dance, its water for the emotions.  Find an occasion to laugh, its freeing for the soul.  And, find a time to smile, its relief for the spirit. 

I often frequent a poem my published poet of a wife wrote years ago; in part, it goes like this:

"...There is this Man whom I have meet,

The most incredible Person I've encountered yet!

He provides me with strength and love beyond any brim,

And is always, always there whenever I need Him!

Every spring He generously brings me flowers,

Let's me enjoy new life and gentle rain showers.

The idea that His heart aches when I am in pain

Truly humbles me and boggles my brain.

The fact that He even cares for me is hard to believe,

And His unconditional love is simply too tough to conceive..."

The Man, of course, is Jesus; and, He created life to be enjoyed.  Additional, He, I submit, created life that is a dance; He, I'm convinced, created life intended for laughter; and He, I just know it, created life with a smile.  Folks, its spring time - flowers are abundant, the hills are green, showers have visited us off and on these past few weeks - today: dance, laugh and smile, you'll be so glad you did!  And, as you do, look up to your Creator and say thanks - He's blessed you with so much.  Last, let's together not be okay with that: the lack of dancing, the lack of laughter and the lack of smiles; may we collectively add to our lives these tangible reminders that life is to be lived!

An old journal entry

Just found this and thought I'd share an old journal entry from September 10, 1996; I wrote this at 3:58 in the morning...

"At first, I couldn't sleep.  So, I'm laying there grumbling in my spirit and Tanzania is visioned across my mind, wow!  Okay, I'm next to the most beautiful woman in the world; alright, I can deal with that... I mean, I was away from her for 24 days.  Oh yea, I'm not on a mat in the middle of an African rain storm, getting wet by the second.  I'm not sleeping in the hotel, or guest house, where prostitutes frequent and most likely brought their sin to the very bed I had to rest on.  I'm not sleeping in a mosquito net to protect me from the malaria infested mosquito looming in the room to strike at me.  Or, I'm not outside on rocks in a remote village - hey, I am on a $3,000 bed, a designer style bed that is without a doubt the most comfy bed in the world - a bed that is paid in full, too!  Thanks Lord, I guess I am thankful.  Okay, I will try and sleep.  Nope, can't do it.  So, I go downstairs and open the fridge.  Oh, I forgot, East Africans don't have these cold boxes, thanks Lord.  Out comes 3 sets of juices, 3 bags of chips, 3 peanut butter sandwiches, 3 cookies wrapped in plastic bags to put into 3 brown sacks - you know, food for my three guys for their lunch at school (...can you imagine if my friends in Africa had this luxury?).  Thanks Lord!  I guess I will do start my laundry now; man, do you remember Regina - our African servant, 11,000 miles away?  The one who worked 14 hours a day to feed our team; and, when we retired to rest, she stayed up to cleaned my grimy and smelly clothes for only 200 shillings!  Oh, my washer and dryer... over a $1000, paid for.  Thank you again Lord, how can I be so ungrateful?  Well, I've made it back to my desk, ready to read my Bible - a Bible that costs over 2 months of income for my new friends in Africa; and, not to mention, one of five I own.  Most Tanzanians can't read and most, well, most could never afford God's Word.  My coffee is done now, so I go to the kitchen and put in French vanilla (... do you remember complaining because the chi they gave us had milk in it?) to accompany my addiction.  Back in my home office now, sitting on a designer chair, a desk that is well over $1200; man, what a luxury (do you remember the chair Marty sat in and it broke?  That chair was so old; I would throw it away - the Tanzanians, they immediately began to fix it).  Oh yea, the lights that allow me to read my Bible and write this, they're really bright - nothing like the tin cans that frequent the homes in Tanzania, cans filled with kerosene that emit a black smoke that not only made me cough, the light was so dim I couldn't really see anything.  My eyes are now tearing up; in fact, tears are racing down my cheeks.  I have so much to be thankful for... I am so blessed.  The Psalm that got to me is chapter 50, verse 23, 'He who sacrifices thanks offerings honors me, and he prepares the way so that I may show him the salvation of God!'  Forgive me Lord for neglecting a grateful heart... thanks, thanks and thanks!  You are so good to me my Savior, may Your Name be blessed forever and ever, amen."

Looking back, all these years, I find myself still trapped in a western cultured worldview; I, we have so much in abundance, its simply mindbogglingly.  Today, my heart is inclined to simply look up and say, "Thank You God!"  A gentle reminder to my spirit that every good and perfect gift comes from above (James to the early church).



The Zone

The Zone

The other day I was on a 6 mile run along the bluff just north of Cayucos, totally enjoying the sound of the waves, the mist of the salt water, the birds singing and the absolute beauty of the Central Coast.  As I was increasing my pace, I soon entered The Zone and I was experiencing runners high (If you’ve never experienced an endorphin rush that comes from an elevated heart rate during physical exercise, there’s really nothing like it – it’s simply amazing), a natural high that made all of my issues, my problems seem miniscule.

After my run, as I was driving back to my home in Morro Bay, with sweat rolling down my face, tears welled up in my eyes as I began to reflect on the wonderful life I’ve been blessed with; seriously, a caring & great looking wife, wonderful children, excellent health, a cool job, and a daily relationship with my Creator – so much to be grateful for, the tears just came naturally!

A few hours later, the tyranny of the urgent began to dim The Zone and life had a way of getting back to normal.  Have you ever been there?  When life was working so well only to be blindsided by a disappointment?  Well, of course you have, we all have.  My question, literally then, is how can one maintain that balance of life’s demands and maintain The Zone, as in a runner’s high?  How can I, you, us plod along and not only keep perspective, but also maintain a positive, it will all work out for the good mentality through the good and the bad? 

As a Chaplain and a Pastor, often I deal with some difficult, real life issues; issues like suicide, divorce, drug and alcohol addictions – life issues that if I don’t keep perspective, my mind would short circuit in a matter of seconds.  Here’s a few of the things I do to help keep me, for the most part, stay in The Zone:

• Physical exercise – again, being shape and feeling healthy is paramount for a balanced life
• Alone time – since I’m in the public sector so much, being alone by intention is a great debrief for me
• Daily appointments – I maintain a daily meeting with my Lord to grow spiritually
• Stay positive – I do my best to look at the bright side of things and try to champion the good in others
• Keep perspective – a famous author once wrote, “...all things work together for the good for those who love God...” (Paul to a church in Rome – 1st Century); keeping perspective is key in weathering life

Recently, the MBPD has undergone some radical changes.  From my buddy Richard retiring to Chief Olivas being blessed with a great career move, maintaining a positive outlook and keeping proper perspective is what’s going to get this great department through the impending transitions.  Yes, these announcements and others can move a committed department to anxiety, stress and perhaps even anger or depression; however, by deploying a bit of above, the MBPD will be just fine. 

All to say, if you’re life is chaotic lately, go for a run, get alone, spend some time with your Creator, stay positive and keep perspective – it will all work out!  Thanks for reading, have a great day...

Change

I have learned over the years there is one constant in life and it is constant called change.  Change is defined as to make different, to alter a course or to modify a situation.  Whatever you do, where ever you go, you can be assured of one thing: change will greet you with open arms.   As a pastor, as a chaplain, as a husband, father, friend, coach, I deal with change every day.  When it is good change, oh – it is the best.  When it is bad change, oh – it stinks.  The outcome, though, is always dependent upon how I deal with the inevitable; namely, change will be on the horizon.

Recently, I had a moment, a moment of extreme sadness and melancholy.  It was a Thursday morning and I was in my office working through administrative duties.  I received a phone call the day before informing me that change was knocking on my door.  You see, every Friday, for about six hours, I travel around with the Morro Bay Police Department as a Chaplain.  I have come to totally enjoy my Friday afternoons working with my buddy Richard – watching him perform impeccable police work and being called upon to provide comforting words to the hurting and to bring a hug of encouragement to the distraught.  Well, the phone call informed that Richard was retiring after 35 years of police work.  Initially, I was stoked for my good friend; seriously, a great career executed by an amazing man leaving a memorable legacy is worthy of retirement, right?  Of course!  However, a day later, I was saddened, bummed out and I must confess selfish, “... my Friday’s will never be the same!”  My course of action: I closed my office door, pulled the blinds shut, put on my gym clothes and went over to Fitness Works for a 50 minute cardio workout followed by 200 crunches... I felt better.

When change comes, there are few things I’d encourage you to utilize to navigate your course of action:

1. Embrace it – since change is foreseeable, it makes sense to simply accept it.  There’s an old proverb that says, “The bamboo that bends is stronger that the oak that resists.”  My favorite Pastor puts it this way, “Blessed are the flexible, for they shall not break!”  In the case of Richard’s retirement – it is what it is!  I can’t change it, alter it or manipulate it... I simply have to embrace it.
2. Learn from it – ask yourself what you can learn from the unavoidable; is there something in the change that I can take away to make me a stronger, better person.  Augustine once said when asked about change, “... keep adding, keep walking and keep advancing!”  In other words, how can change grow us in our relationship with our Creator?  I have learned compassion, grace, mercy and love from Richard; not only verbally, but by his example and lifestyle.  My hope is that I can apply what I’ve learned from my pal and incorporate that into my sphere of influence as a pastor and chaplain.
3. Know there’s a future good – when we step out of a situation and view the change with objectivity and pragmatism, the prospect of good coming out of it is clearly visible.  A former Jewish leader named Paul once wrote in a letter to a group of followers in Rome, “... all things work together for the good to those who love God and are called according to His purpose.”  Yes, I will miss hanging out with Richard on Friday afternoons; however, not only will I am able to serve alongside other police officers on Friday’s, I know Richard’s future is bright and full of new opportunities to continue his quest to love on, care for and practically assist the down and out of Morro Bay in totally new ways. 

Well, thanks for hearing my heart.  Richard – we love, honor and respect you.  I will miss our Friday’s, no question.  However, I look forward to future assignments with you as we do our best to serve the citizens of Morro Bay.  To close this brief note, I quote from the lips of Phyllis during yesterday’s house visit, “Richard, you’re retiring?  You are so loved!  You are such a great man!  Thank you!”  Richard’s response: “Thank you!  Just because I’m retired, doesn’t mean I quit caring.  When you see my truck driving up on your property, know I am coming by to check in on you!”  This is the mark of a great man: though retired, he will continue to care, love and serve the object of his heart: people!  Thanks Richard, you’re a keeper!

"Spiritual Antennas"

                  A few years ago, while in Northern Ethiopia, I learned a valuable lesson, a lesson in “Spiritual Antennas!”  You see, I was leading a team of eight missionaries from the West with the goal of starting new churches.  Our target area was in a remote village called Ambo, some three hundred kilometers north of the capital city of Addis Ababa.  It was a Tuesday afternoon when this idea of “Spiritual Antennas” became real for me.  I was with my national translator at a store front on the side of the dirt road; a store made out of mud, cow dung & straw, a store that sold only the necessities of life.  As we began to talk, a group of fifteen men began yelling, screaming and making all kinds of threats - these men were followers of Animism and they felt I, a westerner, was espousing concepts that would bring evil spirits into their village.  Quickly, I informed my translator that we should move on and respect their wishes; he agreed and we walked down the dusty, dirty path toward the countryside.  Within five minutes, the entire village began to scream, yell and cry with utterances that I’ve never heard before.   We were informed that two young boys were feared to have drowned in the river just over the nearby rolling hill.  What I experienced in the next hour was a defining moment in my life: not only did I witness two lifeless boys being pulled out of the raging river, not only I experience deep, deep sadness in the very core of my heart, I was soon to become the blame for this horrific tragedy.                 

                  “Spiritual Antennas” can be defined as an intuition, a sense of something going on around you that is bigger, greater and worthy of attention.  I will never forget that Tuesday for as long as I live.  Yes, the range of emotions I experienced is as real today as it was then, the visual of the men yelling at me, of the two boys, of the mother’s deep pain expressed in wailings no man wants to hear – yes, that day is etched into my memory bank for many years to come.  What I find intriguing though, even now, is the sense I had, the “Spiritual Antennas” my Creator ignited in me, as this entire scene was being played out in front of me like a movie.  You see, because I’m a novice in Amharic, Ethiopia’s native tongue, I had no idea what was going on at the time, no clue my life was in danger.  I did know two things, though.  First, as they carried the limp bodies back to the village, there was this wall between the families and I that was a real as any wall I’ve ever touched!  I greatly desired to carry one of the boys back to the village, to come alongside the family, to cry with them, to hug them, to be with them during this horrific time; however, I simply couldn’t.  Second, as a result of that very real barrier between them and myself, my “Spiritual Antennas” spoke load and clear that I’d better gather my team and leave the area immediately (most of our national friends who came north with us told us not to worry, everything would be fine...boy, were they wrong!).  Accordingly, I sent out word to my team to get back to the hotel, we were leaving.  Within an hour, we were packed and in our rented vehicles heading back to the capital.

                  I’ve learned over the years to live and to trust in “Spiritual Antennas!”  A trusted man in antiquity named Paul once wrote, “...if you are of the Spirit, then be in step with the Spirit.”  In our language, it says, “...if you’re a follower of the Way, then be in touch and in tune with your surroundings – listen closely to what I’m, your Creator, am saying.”  Obviously, I follow my favorite Rabbi whom my buddy Richard calls my ‘2,000 year old buddy.’  Chaplain Jack, Chaplain Jim and I all rely strongly on our spiritual intuition with our favorite Rabbi to function in our respective churches and, within the MBPD as Chaplains.  And we count it an absolute honor to serve, to come alongside and to assist our family at the PD and our Morro Bay residents in spiritual matters.

                  As I reflect back on that Tuesday, even as I pen this article, my heart still moves with compassion for the village of Ambo.  The postscript is thought provoking: about three weeks after I returned to the states, I received an email from my translator.  He informed that the man yelling at me the most, the owner of the store, was the father of both of the boys who drowned: yes, they were brothers.  I was also informed a bomb was immediately built that afternoon intended to be thrown into my hotel room late to kill me.  And, I was told that most of the village was intrigued and moved to ‘follow’ the God of the white man, because the gods of Ambo couldn’t save the boys.  The result: years later, four new churches have started in Ambo.  Crazy days, no question!  I still see the father’s face in my mind; sometimes nightmares visit me about the incident.  And, yes – I still pray for this man and his family, I hope someday I can hug, hold and cry with him; and, who knows, perhaps he and his family attend one of the new churches?  Not sure, one thing I do know though: if it weren’t for “Spiritual Antennas”, I might not be here today...